Volume 7, Issue 7, page 5

The Devil Proposes -- But God Disposes
N ENGLISHMAN talks with the Devil.

ME -- Now, look heah, Old Boy, a lot of jolly
rot has been talked about this Scientology
business. Have you had a hand in it?
DEVIL -- Well, now that you mention it, I do
vaguely remember stirring it up a bit.

ME -- May I ask exactly what you did? I'm a
little puzzled, because there seems to be such
a lot of good stuff, and yet --
DEVILóActually, I didn't have to do much.
I wasn't strong enough to interfere. You-KnowWho was behind it, you see, and when He gets
going on something, there just ain't much
stopping Him...

ME -- Well, then?
DEVIL -- Aw, shucks, it was nuttin'; just had
ter give the guy a bit exter on the personality level. It always woiks wit youse humans.

ME -- I'm frightfully intrigued by your
changes in accent, Old Lad. What's the idea?
Just en passant, of course.

DEVIL -- I've got a knack, actually, of slipping into a personality appropriate to the
person I'm talking to. Scientologists know a
lot about it, worse luck.

ME -- Yes, that's one of the jolly things,
learning about communication and a personality
being false sometimes, and all that rot.

DEVIL -- I use their own theories to throw
spanners in the works by enlarging egos and
putting the higher-ups in the set-up into imagining they're small editions of Old Mother.

ME -- Rather a cunning move that. I do hope
I'm immune from getting swelled ego!
DEVIL -- Want me to go out of business? You're
no more immune than the rest of them.

N THE Eighth Dynamic, the Supreme Being, we
have at least found the key question and
Iin a little while we should have it answered on a demonstrable basis. Far from
presumptuous, it is about time... "
(ABILITY, Issue 1181
GOD -- Next!
ANGEL -- We found a man trying to scale Mount
Olympus. We put him in quarantine. He had a
box strapped to him.

GOD -- Description?
ANGEL -- Red hair, permanently angry, multimarried, journalist.

GOD -- DidÑyou give him the Seventh Heaven
ANGEL -- Certainly. Music like the floating
of a silken veil, aspiration mounting like a
yellow butterfly, joy like the shouting of the
Sons of God, love that overcomes time and
death, triumph like the rising of the sun.

GOD -- Beautiful. Beautiful. What did he say?
ANGEL -- He said, "I've got to get an electrode on the bugger."
GOD -- Indeed! What did he mean?
ANGEL -- He said he was having a little trouble with the Eighth and Fifth Dynamics.
GOD -- What is the Eighth Dynamic?
ANGEL -- You, Lord.

GOD -- Oh, yes. The Ogdoad, The Pleroma. My
sons call me by many names.

ANGEL -- (Dutifully, having heard it all before). Yes, Lord.

GOD -- (Casually) And what is the Seventh Dynamic?
ANGEL -- "Spirit ", Lord.

GOD -- That again? They talk of nothing else.
Don't they know it doesn't exist? It they knew
their Latin and Greek they would know that
"spirit" and "psyche" mean"wind", no more.
What is his accessibility quotient?
ANGEL -- Less than one percent.
GOD -- Send him back. Next!
ME -- I say, really...

DEVILóLook, Friend, for a long time YouKnow-Who and I have had a working agreement.
It's a nice friendly division of power. Maybe
I've got the thin end of the stick, but I know
my limitations -- which is more than you can say
of some Scientologists.

ME -- You mean to say, then, you have some strings in the advertising and marketing fields,
power over us via the ego or personality? by medical propaganda, by sticking them in
DEVIL -- And how, Friend, and how! That hap- tedious working conditions, by making their
pens to be my division, and Old Y-K-W has the lives more and more machine-like.
rest right thru to Glory and beyond -- Hallelujah! ME -- All right, you've made your point. But
ME -- I wish you wouldn't be so facetious, haven't we gotten off the subject? What diviOld Boy. Please stick to the point. It's al- sion that Y-K-W controls concerns us as human
ways the same when I talk to you. You make beings?
such reasonable conversation and crack crude DEVILóHe is interested in the Essential
jokes. Remember, I'm an Englishman. You and I am interested in the personality that
DEVIL -- As you wish. I agree my sense of hu- is a result of heredity and environment. Can I
mor is a little perverted, but really, you put it any simpler than that?
know, I have gotten used to spending such a MEóMy dear Chappie, you could not be more
lot of time with the most powerful country in obtuse. I'm used to the idea of Thetah, which
the world -- sowing strong personalities, and at is the jolly old bottled-up spirit and MEST
the same time, putting people to sleep... which is the physical universe=-after Einstein
ME -- Just a moment. The Americans happen to of course.
be an alert and virile race. I happen to know, DEVIL -- Yeah, the whole lot having to be inbecause I observed some Air Force types having terpreted via the mind -- ego-personality. Where
a beano in a pub -- - does the Essential You come in?
DEVIL -- Friend, most people are in a waking- NEóPlease! Do you think I haven't studied
sleep state, and I increase this by subtle Old Mother? It's obviously the Thetan...remem