for General Membership to $25 for Special or Professional Membership. In addition -- to retain active status -- each group must report activities for the past month as well as plans for the coming month. Those without HA$I memberships will be considered "guests" until after they pay.

There are many less platinum-plated therapies and systems. Among these is Art Coulter's Synergetics, which has been "given" to those who will use it; William Furr's Telelogic Processing, which can be had for $10 a month over a two-year period; and Jim Welgos's "Lessons in Living", which is a mixture of dianetics, psychology, and do-goodism, and costs only $18 for the course of 50 lessons. Without trying to evaluate them (they may be worth just what they cost, or much more, or less), it's certain they're going to attract people who -- even at the risk of being branded "squirrels" -- need and want help, yet can't afford seats in $¢ientology's diamond-studded horseshoe.

We can't help but wonder what has happened in Phoenix. Has Ron lost control of his own organization to a board which has sold him the idea of making $¢ientology scarce -- and therefore valuable? And what of the graduates who've paid one or more $500 for courses, and now are being told their certificates are invalid unless they take the newest training? obtain a new certificate that tomorrow may be just as obsolete as the one they now have?

But all is not lost. Schools, groups, and individuals that paid up to $10 an hour for lecture tapes when another "This is it" technique was in its heyday, are told that these "obsolete" tapes will be redeemed by the HA$I on new releases at $3, per 1,200-foot spool.

If this is a non-profit organization, and it costs members this much for the HA$I not to make a profit, it might be cheaper on the "field" if the HA$I was re-reorganized into a profit organization.

Of course, the entire fault may lie at the feet of Phoenix landlords. Since it is taking so much of that high-priced city to house the many branches of the HA$I, the CEC$, the HDRF, the C of $ of P, the FF, etc., it may be that only a key to the vaults under Fort Knox would support these tourist-sucking leeches in the manner to which they'd like to become accustomed.

How "Infinite" Can You Be?

IS, and ALWAYS HAS BEEN,

a Charter Member of

The Infinites

No.

issued by The ABERREE, 207 N. Washington, Enid. Okla.

MESTime Date_____________________________

PLEDGE -- In accepting this membership, I hereby "confess" that I am a part of The INFINITE; that I always have been part of The INFINITE, and always will be part of The INFINITE -- and subscribe to the axiom that Infinity, having no beginning and no ending, therefore is immortal as well as Timeless.

Also, I will look upon no one as being a "Split Infinity" unless they so insist, and will do everything in my power to recognize their rights to exist in their Own Universe as part of The Infinite Whole.

Signed _______________________________________

It's hard to believe, but some persons take The ABERREE seriously. And this is not limited to residents of Phoenix.

Started last month as a tongue-in-the-cheek jest, a "new" organization was formed -- with no dues, no courses, no books to buy -- called "The Infinites". If anyone needed a card identifying them as part of infinity, this could be obtained free for the mere asking.

Maybe those who wrote in asking for a card were being just as facetious as we were, but to keep our promise, we had to rush copy to a printer. This made everybody happy: those who now have evidence (see replica above) they're not "split infinities", and the printer. Especially, the printer.

However, in some of the requests for cards, there was a slight serious tone, too. They like the name. Also the idea. Maybe it was the dichotomy of not having to mortgage the family homestead they liked. But we've been asked to enlarge upon the organization and make it permanent.

Well, if infinity isn't permanent, we don't know what is. Anyone with some ideas on the subject is invited to expound.

And in the meantime, there are a few cards left. Of course, we've doubled the price -- but even at that, double nothing still isn't very expensive.