Globicides
GLOBICIDES 
Dr. Robert Oppenheimer, whose know-how is credited with making the A-bomb possible, has been suspended from atomic research by the Atomic Energy Commission. Charge: he knew, loved, and married persons with alleged Communist leanings BEFORE the U.S. started using the physicist to make the A-bomb. But the main admitted objection: he opposed making the H-bomb.
A strip tease dancer in Los Angeles went farther than her sisters: she stripped off her memory. However, she retained one 'phone number, which helped police to locate her home, friends, and a news reporter. She got her picture in the paper, which is pretty good, for a stripper, at 31.
The. U. S. has just inflicted England with a new plague: parking meters. Fifty of the things are being set up at Leicester, to tap each victim six pence for two hours.
An over-parker at Richmond, Calif., so resented the ticket and fine that he sent his $3 in a sealed copper tube. Police treated it as a bomb, and added an additional $7 fine to placate them for their terror.
A Keokuk, Iowa, preacher has been accused of immoral conduct because his "love thy neighbor" prayer meetings included kissing among the congregation and the wearing of as few clothes as the members "dared".
The Army's once-proud cavalry has been reduced to 30 old nags at Fort Riley, Kas., and since Congress has cut off appropriations for the horses' upkeep, Army brass are in a stew.
Thousands of mysterious pitted windshields have Seattle motorists and City officials in a panic.
MACHINE REPLACES APPETITE
The idea for the above cartoon was dictated by several students of a recent Clinical Course, who discovered the Mathison E-400 would double for a basic metabolism testing machine. By holding the electrode and taking a deep breath, the surge needle bangs against the right hand pin -- but only if the person holding the can has had enough sleep or food. Students began checking the machine each morning to see whether they'd had sufficient breakfast to get a full needle throw. Strangely enough, several discovered not only that their diet was insufficient, but their sleeping habits also needed serious adjustments.
